Three Pregnancies…I’m Glad I Did It!
I am the mother of three wonderful children. I am almost ashamed to say this, but my first pregnancy was unexpected, for I was a teenage mother. My second pregnancy was as normal as normal could be, while the third could have taken my life and that of my unborn child. Ugh! Let me begin with the first…
Pregnancy #1
I have always been good girl. I was active in church, I hung around positive people, I was a good daughter, and an excellent student. Even though my family lived in poverty, God placed within my heart the willingness to be a good person. Despite striving to be upright, I liked a popular guy at school, and we dated for about four months until he began to pressure me to have sex with him. I resisted him as long as I could, but he threatened that he would break up with me unless I had sex with him. I was afraid because I was a virgin and I knew I would sin against God if I gave in to this charming guy who said he would never hurt me. Peer pressure really sucks! I did it! I had sex with this guy, yet I didn’t even want to do it! I hated myself for giving in to him and for being so weak. Soon afterwards, I despised him because he rejected me and treated me as if I didn’t matter! He lied to his family by telling them that he was not involved with me. That hurt! I gave up my virginity to a guy who didn’t respect or love me and I knew God had to be mad at me, too.
As time passed, I realized I was pregnant, but I ignored the fact that a baby was growing inside of me. Three months passed…my belly was swelling! Uh oh! Four months passed…I was getting bigger! My clothes were getting smaller and my body was getting bigger. I was having a hard time hiding my pregnant belly from my mother and father. Upon the sixth month, my mother looked at me, unexpectedly, and asked me if I was pregnant. With tears running down my face, I could no longer hide from her. For six months, I denied my baby proper prenatal care until Mom found out! She was angry with me, but she immediately took me to the local clinic, where they ran some tests, determined I was truly pregnant, and started a regimen of prenatal care so I could care for the baby I was completely neglecting. For the rest of my pregnancy, I took care of my baby by eating right, taking my prenatal vitamins, and getting the proper rest I needed in order for my baby to grow and develop properly. Even though my ex-boyfriend denied my baby, she was mine and I had to do all I could to make sure she was healthy. Upon the 9thmonth of pregnancy, she was born! She was healthy, happy, and beautiful. The delivery of my baby girl was the easiest delivery of my three pregnancies! Four hours and 21 minutes! The contractions were minor up until the last few…they were pretty rough! Whew!
That story was tough to rehash, for I have suppressed it for 33 years. With God’s help, I raised my little girl through a time of poverty, denial and uncertainty. Even though it was difficult being a teenage mother with very little support, I knew God would never leave me! He had my back all along! How do I know this? My baby, who is now a 33-year old woman, who works as a USDA Inspector and is currently a small business owner, loves Jesus and adores me for the sacrifices I made for her. She is now my best friend and I am so pleased that she successfully made it through this crazy journey with me. I love you Kristian!
Pregnancy #2
Once I got my act together, I married an amazing guy and after a courtship for a couple of years, we decided to get married. During premarital counselling, I expressed to the Pastor that I did not want to have any more children since I already experienced an emotional, life-altering, and difficult experience while raising my daughter. Having more children seemed like so much of the same pain and suffering that I went through while raising Kristian. The Pastor assured me I needed to trust that God will allow my husband to provide for my family. I submitted to this man and I became pregnant with my second child. When I found I was pregnant, I immediately began to take care of my unborn child by filling my body with only good stuff! And yes, I TOOK MY PRENATAL VITAMINS EVERYDAY! HA! I didn’t experience morning sickness, my skin glowed, I was happy, I was healthy, and I actually lost weight, even though I craved watermelon several times a day…thank God I was pregnant during the summer months when watermelon was at its peak season.
During my second delivery, I received an epidural! The best med I believe God could have ever created! I didn’t feel a thing. This delivery ended with a beautiful baby boy that had the longest cone head I have ever seen. That head worried me, but the nurse told me I could mold his precious little head. Every time I held him, I softly caressed his little dome…lol! Now he has a perfectly round “BIG” head (at least underneath all of the hair that these teenagers tend to grow). My baby grew beautifully! I must believe it was due to the excellent care I gave him while he was in the womb. Skipping ahead 17 years, my son is a handsome, God-fearing, 215-pound linebacker/running back, that is highly intelligent, and will most likely attend any of the Ivy League Schools that have reached out to him. All I can say is…Goooo Julian! I’m so proud of you! Did I mention that his career objective is become to be an ophthalmologist…so proud!
Pregnancy #3
All I can say is that God must have really wanted this little guy to be on this Earth! This pregnancy posed the biggest struggle and tested motherhood during and after pregnancy. It was during this pregnancy that I was diagnosed with Protein S deficiency after presenting to the ER with several small pulmonary emboli at the base of my lungs. Evidently, I could have died due to the PE, but the meds that were prescribed are known to cause genetic defects in unborn babies. At that point, I was under the care of a Hemotologist, a Neonatal Specialist, and an OB/GYN. I had to regularly visit the doctor from one to three times each week. Once I reached my fourth month of pregnancy, my OB/GYN insisted that I be placed on bedrest due to a thinning cervix. My incompetent cervix could have led to a premature delivery. With the idea of a premature child born with a genetic disorder looming over my head, I stayed in bed while taking injections in my tummy twice daily and going to the doctor more than desired. This was frustrating and unnerving to me because this third child was also unexpected. He turned my life upside down. The Neonatal Specialist told me that I could have an amniocentesis performed at 36 weeks to determine if my baby was fully developed and if he was going to be born with defects. I was informed that my baby was perfectly normal, and I could deliver early because his bodily systems were able to operate on their own. Little did I know that an induced labor was very painful. The Pitocin that was used to dilate my cervix caused extreme pain. Labor with this little booger lasted for 26 hours. I was extremely overwhelmed when he was born. I had so many mixed emotions.
Even though this little boy was completely healthy, he cried sooooo much. Kristian, Julian and I would just sit and look at him in amazement while he was fussing because he seemed to cry for no reason…even after all of his needs were met…go figure!
Fast forwarding 16 years, this fellow is one of the most compassionate, endearing, athletically-gifted, intelligent, talented, God-fearing young men I have ever known. Even though he has had his bout with injury, I know that he will be one of the most successful Therapists in Sports Medicine that will ever be known. I am so happy that Myles is here to share life with me! I love you so much!
“O LORD, you have examined me, and you know me. You knitted me together inside my mother. I will give thanks to you because I have been so amazingly and miraculously made. Your works are miraculous, and my soul is fully aware of this. Your eyes saw me when I was only a fetus. Every day ⌊of my life⌋ was recorded in your book before one of them had taken place. How precious are your thoughts concerning me, O God!”
Psalms 139:1,13-14,16
To all of my babies…”Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your bodies.” I Corinthians 6:19-20 NIV
Many Blessings To All The Mothers, Educators, and Survivors! Gods Got You!
~ Kyra Beris ~
Mother, Educator, Survivor
